There are many good reasons to watch the Super Bowl, from the chance for an entertaining football game to the individual stories of the players involved to the camaraderie enjoyed at a Super Bowl party to commercials and the ability to keep up with what everyone will be talking about at work come Monday.

But unless you legitimately have something way cooler to do on Sunday night — talking, like, cool enough that there’s a good chance you wind up dangling off the bottom of a helicopter full of beautiful people while an evil super-villain’s compound explodes beneath you — then the only real good reason to skip out on watching the Super Bowl is still a compelling one: The smug sense of superiority you will reap from being the person at the office or the bar or the next family gathering who did not watch the Super Bowl.

There’s two ways you can carry it, though one is clearly better than the other.

The first way — the lamer way — is to make clear that you ignored the game for moral, philosophical political purposes. And maybe you’re reading this thinking, “Hey, wait a minute, I have strong convictions and plenty of justification for boycotting football,” and I’m not saying you’re wrong. Maybe you’re rightfully upset about the league’s treatment of head injuries, or you’re mad about either players kneeling for the national anthem or the NFL’s response to players kneeling for the national anthem.

But none of those things is exactly breaking news, and none of the millions of your fellow Americans who rationalized watching the game will want to indulge your take on the matter come Monday. I’m sorry to be the one to break that to you, but it’s the case.

The far better way to play skipping the Super Bowl is to pretend like you had no idea it was even happening.

Don’t act like you’ve never heard of the Super Bowl — that would be ridiculous. People would think you’d lost your mind, or they’d know you were putting them on. Instead, when someone’s like, “Hey, how ’bout that game, huh?” just smile and be like, “yeah!” Then, when they say, “That Tom Brady is something else,” maybe squint and look a little confused. Only when they finally mention the Super Bowl by name should you say, “yeah… Super Bowl,” all drawn out and tentative like you’re just now figuring out that this person is talking about the Super Bowl and that you missed it.

Because then that person thinks, “Whoa, what the hell is this guy’s deal?” or “Wait, did she really not know yesterday was the Super Bowl? She seems so normal!” Word will spread throughout your workspace or social circle that you seemed to have no idea that Super Bowl LIII came and went Sunday night, and you find yourself a person of great intrigue. They will think that you must have so much going on that you didn’t even watch the Super Bowl, you will occupy their heads forever, and they will never know that you were home alone binge-watching Shameless on Netflix.